The "M" Family
We have always enjoyed kids and always knew we wanted a big family. After our third biological child was born, I was told I could not have any more children without serious complications/risks. We struggled with that news for over a year because our hearts still wanted more children, but we did not know how to welcome more into our family safely. God put adoption on each of our hearts separately, and we both were so nervous to bring up the idea to the other; but once we did, we were in agreement!
We began our adoption journey with an adoption agency. We were waiting for a match when an "outside opportunity" presented itself from Ray's office. Even though that match did not end with placement, the agency let us use both offices until a match with Ray's office the second time. Then when that match also did not end in placement, we just had enjoyed working with Ray's office so much that we stayed on exclusively with them. The agency was so wonderful with education requirements and being a hand to hold during a time we didn't know what to expect, but Ray's office was so efficient that we knew that was who we wanted to work with. We then got to work with Ray’s office a second time when our adopted son's birth sister also joined our crew!
We saw God when we did not even think of adoption as an option, and then God placed it on both of our hearts. We have also seen a long-term match fall through. Once we had our son, we knew that he was exactly who we had been longing for and that God had known best for us, even though we had a season of heartache. Having Mia join our crew was another moment of God's goodness. We still were feeling that our family was not quite complete, and then we got the call that she was coming our way. John's co-workers came to his aide to cover his shifts so we could be with her in the NICU, and various family members and friends surrounded us during that tricky transition.
Practically, I would recommend reading books on adoption, listening to podcasts, and talking to others who have gone through it. I would also recommend having a financial nest egg for the process because sometimes, the matches are quick and you do not want finances to be the thing holding you back from being able to say yes. From a more emotional standpoint, I would recommend making at least one friend who is either going through adoption also or who has gone through it. There are so many unique experiences that only adoptive parents understand or can answer questions for/give advice to. It was such a blessing for me to have met some people, so I did not feel so isolated during the process.
We love that our younger children are biological siblings and that I also keep in frequent contact with their birth mother. She just wants to check in and ask how they are doing, but to know she loves them; and to have all that information to share with the kids when they get older is such a blessing.